Business Growth and Sustainability is a Farce

Sustainability + Growth?” That’s the holy grail, right?

I mean, I’ve invested in (and occasionally jumped ship from) hundreds of businesses. Trust me when I say most can’t pull off the “we care about the planet and our bottom line” act without tipping heavily in one direction. If you’re doubling production, lengthening supply chains, and slapping trendy eco-labels on the packaging, guess what—your idea of “sustainability” may be as flimsy as that compostable coffee cup I left in the car.

But hey, who am I to kill the vibe? If you absolutely must chase growth without completely wrecking the planet, here’s a half-baked attempt:

Design with Longevity in Mind
Everything’s so “planned obsolescence” these days. Make products that last, so you’re not pumping out endless replacements.

Go Digital, But Watch the E-Waste
Switching to cloud services can trim your carbon footprint. Just don’t forget those server farms slurp energy like it’s going out of style.

Offset—No, Really
Wanna buy your way out of guilt? Fine, but do it properly. Think reforestation, sustainable farming, or community-driven renewable projects, not random carbon-credit bingo.

Circular Over Linear
Build closed-loop systems where materials get reused. If you can’t do that, at least figure out a decent end-of-life plan for your products.

Local Partnerships
Swoop into communities, work with local suppliers, and make a positive impact before plastering it all over your corporate PR. That’s half of what sustainability is about anyway: not being a jerk.

Look, I’m as self-deprecating as they come—I’ll admit most of my businesses weren’t shining beacons of ecological virtue. But if you insist on fueling growth while still calling yourself sustainable, the least you can do is try. Just don’t ask me to believe you’re saving the world while you’re at it.